I left a toxic environment.

It was a good choice to leave for my sanity. But I took a lower position, going to work my way up. But it is not in a creative field and I am a creative person so I am feeling an emotional struggle to hold on till it’s been a year at least, then I can move around in the business to a new position. That was the plan. I however would prefer to get back to working in a creative field. I just need to read some encouraging words to keep me going on this crazy path of working at a job that is great, but just okay for me.

I am reforming those words. Due to my Dream Job post. I should and will focus more on the dream job. It is one of those things you say you will do more of each year, than several years fly by and you have not done much different. Oh there are moments when things are taking you down that path, then the old familiar things grab you by the hand and skip you backwards or to the side a bit. Saying look at this comfy chair/couch/bed/blanket. Why would you want to face a challenge? Why take a risk? We are not your fear. Follow us over here. Stay where you are and know. But really it is fear in disguise distracting you with a shiny object called comfort zone. 

I refuse to give in! And my secret weapon is you. Yes, tell yourself that you will do this, but also tell everyone else. Have an accountability partner, and from my personal experience have more than one. Write it down. Write the date next to it. Refer back to it. Have a very small goal that you can achieve. Till that goal becomes part of your regular schedule and gets you to where you want to go. Your goals may become totally different as you go down the path. At least though you are going down the path. Finding out if you want to do it and proving that you can do it. Because you deserve the change. You deserve to reach your dreams. 

Do what works best for you. I read a story about someone who wanted to run a marathon. They set out to do so. They injured themselves. They went backwards. But after they healed they set a much smaller goal. One to work their way towards running that marathon. To run for one minute a day. Just one minute. They slowly worked up to five minutes. And not every day. They may never make it to that marathon, but they learned that you do not always have to jump in head first. You can take bite size or really really little bites towards your goals. For me it is writing in this blog. At least once a week. That seems like a small goal. And some of my posts may be shorter than others. And I may not post the same day or the same time. But it will be once a week. Any time that week that I decide. I am also deciding what social media platforms to share the posts on. What works best for my audience? The audience I am trying to reach. Who are they? Where are they? Or is it just for me? Right now it may be just me and that is okay. 

Maybe one day I will answer these questions. Maybe one day I will write out SMART goals. But I suspect I will just add weekly less than 5 minute tasks. Okay, writing the blog post may take more than 5 minutes. But I allow myself to write short or long. That’s the beauty of setting small goals. You also set the parameters. And mine are fluid. Perhaps that is the artist in me.

One response to “I left a toxic environment.”

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